So, I’ve thought about the nights events a bit and also talked to an old friend a bit via texting. She’s gonna be making a pit stop in Memphis tomorrow for a flight so I get to see her. That’ll be nice. I haven’t seen her in forever and it’ll be nice to get a hug. She’s having a hard time with her marriage right now and spent some time at her parents place in Middle Tennessee.
Anyhow, girl I saw tonight and totally have a thing for. Yeah. So she didn’t say never. I asked, “Never?” and she replied, “I don’t know, maybe.” Regardless of what that means I felt sick and depressed. Nothing I can do about that. You see, this is why I don’t date. This is why I don’t ask people out. It hurts. It’s not fun. I suppose that if I were a person that didn’t care and just dated because it’s “fun” then it would be different but I’m not. I date because I really care about the person and want them in my life long-term. It isn’t some game for me. The result of course is that when things don’t go well I feel pretty awful about it. I’m not the guy that just asks people out until someone says okay. I don’t see the point in that.
So anyway… the thinking… She opened up a bit more tonight about some family issues she’s having. I totally feel for her. I went through the same stuff, I was just a lot younger so a lot of it went over my head. Maybe isn’t never. Maybe could just be, not right now, I have no faith left in relationships at the moment.
I dunno.
All I do know is that I think this girl is awesome. I think she hung the moon. I think she is the moon. I can honestly say that I’ve never been so attracted to a person before. The only possible exception would be the girl I’m meeting at the airport tomorrow. Nothing will happen. I have an iron will and she knows it. She’s married, even if she is seperated at the moment. I’m above all that. The girl from tonight though, she could very well beat out girl at airport. I mean, airport and I go way back and we’re super close. I’ve always been massively attracted to her but, the difference in her and maybe girl is that maybe and I are just a better match. Airport and I would never have worked. We work well as friend and were great as friends with a lot of tension but maybe and I, I think we’d work in every way.
Okay, enough of this. I haven’t eaten anything in 14 hours. Gonna go to Schnuck’s and get something to eat.
Thoughts and Such
So, I’ve thought about the nights events a bit and also talked to an old friend a bit via texting. She’s gonna be making a pit stop in Memphis tomorrow for a flight so I get to see her. That’ll be nice. I haven’t seen her in forever and it’ll be nice to get a hug. She’s having a hard time with her marriage right now and spent some time at her parents place in Middle Tennessee.
Anyhow, girl I saw tonight and totally have a thing for. Yeah. So she didn’t say never. I asked, “Never?” and she replied, “I don’t know, maybe.” Regardless of what that means I felt sick and depressed. Nothing I can do about that. You see, this is why I don’t date. This is why I don’t ask people out. It hurts. It’s not fun. I suppose that if I were a person that didn’t care and just dated because it’s “fun” then it would be different but I’m not. I date because I really care about the person and want them in my life long-term. It isn’t some game for me. The result of course is that when things don’t go well I feel pretty awful about it. I’m not the guy that just asks people out until someone says okay. I don’t see the point in that.
So anyway… the thinking… She opened up a bit more tonight about some family issues she’s having. I totally feel for her. I went through the same stuff, I was just a lot younger so a lot of it went over my head. Maybe isn’t never. Maybe could just be, not right now, I have no faith left in relationships at the moment.
I dunno.
All I do know is that I think this girl is awesome. I think she hung the moon. I think she is the moon. I can honestly say that I’ve never been so attracted to a person before. The only possible exception would be the girl I’m meeting at the airport tomorrow. Nothing will happen. I have an iron will and she knows it. She’s married, even if she is seperated at the moment. I’m above all that. The girl from tonight though, she could very well beat out girl at airport. I mean, airport and I go way back and we’re super close. I’ve always been massively attracted to her but, the difference in her and maybe girl is that maybe and I are just a better match. Airport and I would never have worked. We work well as friend and were great as friends with a lot of tension but maybe and I, I think we’d work in every way.
Okay, enough of this. I haven’t eaten anything in 14 hours. Gonna go to Schnuck’s and get something to eat.